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Omastar Comics #37

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It's been a while since a canon entry in the ongoing saga of Omastar.

Well. That's a Cyrus-like turnabout. Whatever happened to the sweet young Omastar from back in the day? Gross.




Adapted from the 19th century original The Dream of the Fisherman's Wife by Hokusai.

Yet another Lego Game...

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Back once again for the renegade master, D4 damager, power to the people.
Back once again for the renegade master, D4 damager, with the ill behavior.

More Lego games... YAWN... Break blocks,build blocks, play through it all again to get all the secrets. Its the same thing over and over, boring innit!

WRONG...

Its fucking great You get to break blocks, build blocks, and it's so good, you get to play it twice. AND ton top of all that its fucking Marvel, and so much fucking Marvel anyone and everyone from the Marvel universe is involved, you cant really hope for more...

...Well, maybe Pizza and a Blowjob.

Because we are lazy, we dropped a note out to our ravenous stalker-fans asking for what they think of the game. Here is a few of the things they said:

"Marvel Lego: Yay"
"Lego Marvel is quite the something though"
"I like it alot the grafics are rele good and the lego men are kool"

Love and Fatboy Slim btw,

Richie X

Le Geek C'est Chic

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We are constantly getting asked for fashion advice here at TGAM. To save us from constantly handing out geek fashion tips on a person by person basis like a budget Gok Wan we've decided to give you a run down of the hottest threads right here on the blog. Generous to a fault. Of course, aside from those whacky cosplayers, your standard geekware is T-shirt and jeans. Badges (that's pins to our Yankee cousins) are sometimes acceptable too. Here's our 2014 collection for your eyes only. 

Fossil Warhol. A montage of the original 9 evolved fossil Pokemon. The eagle eyed amongst you will spot that these are the shiny forms. Of course Nintendo have now made this print vintage by adding two new fossil Pokemon in X and Y so expect the price of these to sky rocket. This one's a Richie original design. You can buy it on REDBUBBLE right here

Understated, simple, toxic. Get it here

Another Richie original. Of course, if your handle isn't Cunzy1 1 and you aren't obsessed with Omastar then it may not be the right look for you. Check with your personal stylist before buying.

This Tee we got from Camden Market. According to the stall owners they're all original designs. We're not too sure about that but one thing we will say is that this T-shirt will definitely get you some knowing nods, some winks and maybe more...

Thanks to the wonders of the Internet now two sets of interests, overlapped will ever be niche enough again. This one's an essential for the Jurassic Park/Pokemon fan. Sadly out of print now. There's a bunch of alt JP/Pokemon designs out there but this one's our favourite. 

Another Camden 'Town original'. For that retro look because it doesn't have a Wii-U or a 3DS on it see?

So we think you've got enough ammunition to give your wardrobe that well needed refresh. Remember darlings your body is art. No need to thank us for the loving you'll get just make sure you whisper "That guy's a maniac" into the ear of your loved one at the critical moment. That's all we want. That's all we've ever wanted. 

Are mobile games any good yet? 2014 edition

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Yeah they are not too bad. Still a bit arse-rapey with monetization.

Love versus Zombies 2,

Richie X

Fire Emblem: Dying

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We're finally on the Fire Emblem:Awakening train! Choo choo. To be honest, we've never really played a Fire Emblem game and until the last few installments they've been somewhat stealth releases in Europe (hence why a mint copy of 2008 Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn for the Wii will set you back £70-£100).

It wasn't until Super Smash Brothers that I even knew this series existed. The latest game, Fire Emblem: Awakening for the Nintendo 3DS widely received rave reviews and we can see why. It's a great little turn based tactical role playing game (for non-gamers you move little people around on a map) but an important element of the game is building up relationships between units that fight with each other so that your characters can fall in love. Aaaaaaah. Also, the game features 'perma-death', actually characters are 'retired', so if a character falls on the field of battle you're left with the decision to either go back to your last save sometimes undoing hours worth of progress or soldier on with the death of a character on your conscience. Already there are some characters I've totally fallen for (Miriel you have my heart, sorry I-can't-even-remember-your-name we're done), protect dearly and go back to my last save point if they befall a tragic death. Others. Meh. They probably deserved it. Here's the three that have died so far. 

Donnel. Early on in the game there's a side quest that if you play the right way will allow you to recruit farmhand Donnel to the team. Enough reviewers have spoiled the fact that this is something you very much want to do. In our game Donnel lays face down in the dirt in the ruins of a bandit camp we saved his mother from. What do you expect with a saucepan for a helmet?
Gaius Another failed recruitment drive. In another mission you have to protect the ruler of a kingdom from an attack on her castle. The game makes it clear that one of the enemies in this mission, thief with a heart of gold Gaius, is a character you might be able to recruit (the teddy bear badge gives it away). The problem is his face is just too weak to counter attacks. What can I say? It was self defense. R.I.P Gaius.
Sumia Sumia is very much a lovable clutz who is very green on the battlefield. She finds her stride when she befriends a stray ornery pegasus (breaking it in doesn't sound quite as nice). She also finds that she becomes extremely vulnerable to arrows in the face. What can I say? War is a cruel mistress and what goes up....

We're only six hours into the game. I expect there will be more, ahem 'casualties'. Especially characters I find quite tiresome. They might find themselves on the somewhat over exposed flanks of my columns if they aren't careful hey Maribelle? Hey? Why don't you go and check out that blind valley Maribelle? We'll wait here for you. Sure. Don't wander out of eye shot. That's it Maribelle. A little bit further...


Quick Thoughts: Crimson Shroud

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We were so so lucky over Christmas we're in the ridiculous happy situation of having a stack of games to play through. We picked up Starship DamreyCrimson Shroud, Donkey Kong Country Returns, Star Fox 64 3D, Fire Emblem Awakening, the Pokemon typing game and Resident Evil: The Mercenaries 3D. It's a great place to be, we're not taking this wonderful wonderful situation for granted. The only downside is what do we play first? Unfortunately, it looks like Nintendo eShop title, Crimson Shroud won't get a look in for a long time. We've played 6 hours of it so far. It got great reviews, technically it's an astonishing feat but with so much other gameplay to get through it's too.... well here's out quick thoughts (tm).


What we liked

  • The aesthetic. It looks like a lovingly detailed tabletop game complete with branded characters bases.
  • The ridiculous depth of the statistics.
  • You get to roll virtual die. Second only to rolling real die. 
  • The story unfolds like a Dungeon Master reading narrative.
  • It reminds us of the awesome Heroquest game on the Amiga.
  • It reminds us of epic Heroquest sessions back in the day.
  • There's a lot of game for a fiver (we picked it up during the Guild sale on eShop).


What we didn't like so much

  • Grindy old school RPG mechanics.
  • Really old fashioned RPG battle dynamics: balance healing, buffs, debuffs and damage. Rinse. repeat.
  • Limited enemy character types in the first six hours at least.
  • Long drawn out battles that don't suit the handheld format.
  • Long battles that you sometimes end up losing and having to redo.
  • Die rolls are only used for combat, could have been used for searching, perception tests etc.


Ultimately, it's just too long for me. A lot of people didn't like Starship Damrey for how short it was and reviewers praised Crimson Shroud for how long it was. Crimson Shroud could have benefited with tiresome padding being cut out but, well we're not the 13 year old gamers with too much time on our hands we used to be and I much prefer a tight 'short story' experience than one that is unnecessarily made longer by having to repeat battles to 'level' up to get past the next sticking point. If you do have oodles of time on your hands and like old school RPGs then go for it but with Fire Emblem and Bravely Default providing huge time sinks on the 3DS, gamers are somewhat spoiled for choice and short on time. 

One Piece: Romance Dream

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Yeah Sorry we are talking about yet another 3DS game, we promise we will talk about some real games soon... Probably.

After Xmas I was bored, I was bored of waiting for Pokemon Bank. And I just kept going in and out of the shop over and over. I had some funds left over and decided to give One Piece: Romance Dream a punt. One Piece is one of those very accessible anime Series, though with over 600 episodes is daunting to anyone outside the circle. I like it. But there has never really been a good or accessible tie-in game, similar Anime's such as Dragon ball, Naruto and Bleach get churned out titles all the while.

But yeah anyway, One piece game on the 3DS, it follows the plot, uses all the revamped TV episodes. And in between the footage, you have most likely seen, you have the crew running in tunnels, looking for boxes and trying to avoid long winded turn-based battles. If it did not have the One Piece licence... This game would not deserve a second glance. That being said it does have the licence and they do the characters justice with a lot of attention to the character animations. I find myself coming back to this game purely to see how the characters were animated. I'm playing the game to see the next special move... Is that a viable dragon to chase? Is there any other games out there in teh past where you thought, I'll get through this mediocrity to see Character X's throwing move, or just to get to the next level to unlock, Limit break 3? Is this a viable reason to play any game!?

I guess - 5/10

Love an Viability,

Richie X

Pokemon Bank

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Every day I wake up and I check for Pokemon
Every day I die a little inside.

Love and Cofagrigus,

Richie X

Retro FFXIII

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This is singlehandedly the best thing I have seen in at lease the past 4-5 hours!

It's so beautiful, I cant help myself!

Best use of Square artist's time

Love and is singlehandedly a word?

Richie X

Holy Friday Monsters Batman!

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Oh look at that, what are we doing now? ANOTHER commentary on a 3DS game... Yeah Yeah we know, its a dying system with jumped up mobile games (with shittier Graphics) we PROMISE we'll do something on a proper system soon! But for now: shut up and shove this in your eyeholes, dicklips.



Well well, Richie look at that, what the fuck are you trying to pull? Not only are you talking about yet another 3DS game but you are talking about one of those "download only" ones from months ago.

Yeah well... Its fucking cheap on the eShop, deal with it, if you have a problem that... then seriously dude, take a long hard look at your life and the things that are important to you, reflect for a while on your priorities, because frankly its our fucking blog, and we do what the fuck we want! We have been resident in this little corner of the internet for seven years, we write pure gold, maybe it doesn't make sense to you now. But some day it will, don't think we don't have this planned, no sirree, we have it all worked out and you "dear reader" are nothing but a pawn along for a free ride.

Anyways... AOTFM: ATT as I like to call it. Is a glorified visual novel, it has a great atmosphere and ambiance created but the sights and sounds of the "game". It genuinely makes me pine for a time when I lived as a kid in 1970s Japan... Which I did not! That is how impressively that atmosphere encapsulates you! The "game" or "light entertainment experience" requires no skill, talent or generates a challenge. It simply is. I like it, it was a relaxing fun experience, my only qualms with it are, that it was a bit short, I could not care about the tacked on card game thing.

Definitely worth £2.69

Love and apparently the Vita is full of shit like this, yet I refuse to buy one!?!

Richie X

Final Fantasy: Lightning returns!

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Alright troops!



ohmygotlookapostaboutagamethatisnota3DStitle.

Its back, FFXIII in its final (ha) form. Dropping the party based shenanigans, the game is all about controlling just Lightning, who is getting down, dirty and quite sexy with the badguys/monsters/Chocobos at the end of time.
So this is the third installment of the FFXIII "Trilogy"... And well in my opinion a welcome addition the FFXIII mechanics have been refined, reinvented and remain familiar yet different. It strikes a wonderful balance and achieves something very few games sequels can do: it doesn't feel like you are starting off from scratch again, especially since you have over leveled your teams from the previous games.

Lightning returns is odd, it a beautiful game and in this iteration you have a million costume options and all of them can be customized. I swear I have spent more of my time in-game pissing about in menus than running about in the over-world! The story has the usual requirements of intrigue and lost-in-translation moments. But it's fucked up and Japanese, sometimes that is all you want from an RPG.

Anyways so Lightning's back, and you can dress her up. woop

Love and Moogleboobs,

Richie X

Bloody Hearthstoners

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Right so, blizzard have brought out a card game thing.

A. Card. Game. Not a massive expansive world, not a spin-off to Starcraft, not a rotational life cycle DoTA clone... A card game.

Aaaand, its good, so fucking good! It shouldn't be, but it is. Right now its a PC game, again, it shouldn't be, but it is. Its a Mobile game that was beta'd on PC but just works great. I remember playing the card games like Pokemon Card game on the Gameboy Colour and even the old Yu-Gi-Oh! Power of Chaos PC games. And see its all its not about the mechanics of the game, which I will not bore you with, or the tie in to the WoW franchise; Its that the game is so beautifully polished and wonderfully balanced.

All of the characters are unique and offer a different experience in play.

The other impressive part is its free, entirely free. Well... Not really free, I mean it does give you the option to buy packs of cards which is very enticing because that is the only way to get new cards is through these packs which can be bough through gold (Grind Currency) or real money. But it monetizes beautifully you don't buy packs as a way to conquer a difficulty wall. You buy them for the fun of collecting cards, you know like when you were a kid... Awesome!

Love and we can all agree that the Shaman is dick.

Richie X

Fuck Video Games

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Hey sports fans. Long time no see. The reason why I've been absent from these pages leaving Richie to hold the fort since January is because I got burnt out by video games. This probably happens to most gamers every now and then but since January this year, I've just become so frustrated with games and the games industry I pretty much cut them out of my life for a while. 

I haven't stopped playing them. At the moment the magical trilogy of Resident Evil Revelations, Pokemon Y and Fire Emblem: Awakening in my 3DS keep me ticking along but my perception of what the video game journalists and industry would consider, I'm not really playing games. Those games are old. Nobody is talking about them still. Why play those? Why not shell out a still-ridiculous amount of money for a new console that it appears nobody wants and nobody seems to know what to with. 

I get a bit obsessive about things and most frequently, video games is one of those things I obsess about. I'll eat, sleep, write and think about video games all the time. I'll surround myself with merchandise. I'll buy games I never play. I'll listen to a video game soundtrack on a loop for weeks on end. But, sadly, I don't have anyone to play video games with regularly. I miss the rapport. I miss playing some of the world's worst games but having a blast because it's with a buddy. So these days I kinda feel like I'm gaming alone and from time to time. Like now, I just feel like the games industry isn't interested in me. I'm not interested in anything on any of the three main consoles. I have no faith in mobile games. I feel like a troglodyte because I still enjoy games on my Wii and PS2 and the zealous 'gaming' community makes me sick. It's a toxic and insular community of the worst kind. As for the gaming 'press' thanks to Google Reader dying, I've been without a decent feed reader and, you know what? I don't miss it. I don't miss the adverts pretending to be copy. I don't miss the opinion posts from people who should be restrained and never be allowed to write about anything. Ever. I don't miss games journalists writing about how much they hate themselves and they're audience.

I find myself watching let's plays and listening to podcasts as the main way I consume games these days and actually, it saves me money and I have a better time all round. I'm not interested in the industry. I'm not interested in developers. I'm interested in a handful of interesting gamers who are passionate about games and the banter they have between each other but I'm so relieved and a little less stressed because I just don't care at the moment.  

Don't get me wrong, this is wholly my issue. It may give you the shit eating grinz(tm) to read a thousand 'articles' on a single 'leaked''leaked' screenshot. It might fill your knickers when cherished franchises get the 'mobile treatment' and how Capcom and Squeenix seem to be in a secret race to bankrupting themselves. But I can't help personify games and gaming and increasingly it's not of interest to me. I get little out of being a 'gamer' and more out of just enjoying a game here and a game there. The entire industry doesn't seem like it can organise anything approaching a sustainable vision and I'm tired. I'm tired of bullshots. I'm tired of second or triple guessing whether a leak is a leak or a publicity stunt. I'm tired of the collective ignorance of the gaming community. I'm tired of CEOs not seeming to realise how awful their decisions are. I'm tired of once loved characters and Universes being shilled for a quick buck. I'm tired of being lied to. I'm tired of the game journalists and their chimpanzee tea party version of journalism. I'm tired of the same old arguments. I'm tired from the non-existent marketing departments turning the whole industry into a house of cards where everyone is making the same game with slightly different colour palettes. I'm tired of unrealistic sales figures. I'm tired of make-or-break launch weekend windows. I'm tired of how unsustainable the industry is. I'm tired of the general incompetency across the board. I'm tired of the big hits increasingly become completely accidental rather than by design. I'm tired of things just not working. I'm tired of trying to find depth in the shallowest of experiences. I'm tired of trying to be an ambassador for the medium. It's becoming so corporately and creatively stale that anyone not ploughing the same furrows trenches we've had since the late 1990's is heralded as the next best thing despite the vast possibility spaces that games could but just aren't exploring. 

I'll snap out of it. I always do. A game will come out that tops my faith up a bit and I'll be back in, shit stained smile and everything but for the time being, the whole industry could burn and I'd learn how to play the fiddle. 

StreetPass Quest: Complete

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Well there you go, after a few months of Constantly looking for streetpasses, Streetpass Quest (and 2) is complete, all items obtained, i never need to rescue the King and his offspring again.

I am nether elated or deflated about this. I now need to find something else to occupy my time for 3 minutes on a commute. The streetpass games are not games, they are at best glorified puzzle games with an evil addictive core to make you a completionist.

I'm not sad Streetpass Quest is out my life, I'm not even that excited I completed it.

Well, there you go...

Love and indifference,

Richie X

Pages from the Diary of... Part 1

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The brick path was laid out before me. The sky hung above me, empty save for one cloud, the air was charged with tension; an electric blue.  Behind me the proud outline of a hill, distant and calm. I ran forward. I ran with determination, as I ran past some bushes I noticed a strange floating square, golden and flashing with an inscription. But before I could investigate further, a creature came ambling towards me, as big as a man, round and with a terrifying stare. Instinctively I leapt into the air, soaring as high as I could, then came crashing down onto the creatures head, flattening it. My foe dispatched, I decided to investigate the floating golden block, but yet there appeared to be more squares. Throwing myself into the air again, I raised my fist and punched the block. The block went dead, turning into a dulled brown, however as a I landed I realised, through whatever trickery, I now had a coin! 

Venturing forth with my new found power, I slammed into the next golden block. but this time no coin... Instead the block seemed to produce a mushroom; yellow an red, exiting the block in an almost phallic display. Already phased by this, I panicked, the Mushroom started eerily sliding. It slid along the blocks. I didn't know why, but I chased it, I felt this mushroom had to be something good. It slid off the edge of the blocks, I attempted to grab it in mid air. Missed. Heart-racing I skidded as I landed, the mushroom had hit the green pipe and changed direction. I ran desperately, I know I had to make that mushroom mine, I was catching up to it.

The world changed, everything felt smaller, I felt every muscle in my body expand, I surged with power.

Project X Zone

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Warning! more 3DS content below!

Whilst Cunzy1_1 witters away his hours on the non-game, Tomodachi Life, forever hoping that the next patch update will allow same-sex marriage. I took a punt on Project X Zone!

It's on sale in the Nintendo shop right now! And honestly it's fantastic.


The only reason I had not purchased it by now was the Demo. The Demo was shit. It showcased some of the art styles, bit did not introduce the player to the concept of the game. I got the impression it was a shallow but pretty button mashy title. Totally not!


The game is mental! It has a really loose story about why Characters from so may different IPs are there, something about tears in reality, but you just dont care, it's fun as it is to just have Streetfighter characters in a RPG setting but when they are interacting with the likes of Virtua Fighter and Tekken characters, It's just so fun!


The game has a pseudo-strategy element, it does not punish you badly for mistakes though. You have to position all your cool little 16-bit animated sprite versions of your characters in position, ideally near another character, but also near enough to the enemy you are attacking. Then you attack the enemy, the screen changes to a 2D fighter like style where you have corresponding keys to create Combos. It can get so wonderfully over the top with super-special moves, crazy cameos and General Cross-over fan service.

Love and here is Morrigans's boobs from in-game,

Richie X

Tales of the Abyss

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Right, fine I'm caving.

After all this drama, outrage, scandal and out of court settlements. I'm just going to give you guys what you want. And that is apparently another half hardhearted incite into yet another 3DS game. Eat it up chumps.


Right so. Tales of the Abyss, a wonderful little gem, a PS2 cult-classic remake for the 3DS.  I jumped on this title as I was a huge fan of Tales of Vesperia on the 360. Its an expansive story driven RPG, and a fantastic port at that too! However! That is a double edged sword... Its a port it's really not meant to be a pick up and play title I was enjoying it on the commute until the story progressed to... Dungeon number 1, which left me with little to no save points. I mean that is fine for a PS2 title, sitting there 15 years ago in front of a TV, but the game pushes you to go through a dungeon. Which means you either just have to close the DS and hope that the batteries don't run out, or time how far you get into the dungeon and how long it would take to get back to the last save point. Not fun... Just gimmie a quicksave Namco! Its not a game breaker!

This crippling point aside, I love the game, the character acting the RPG elements, it's almost flawless in its appeal.

But... How do you find the right time to play it?

Pleh

Love and, well fuck you I'm a commuter,

Richie X

LEGO City Undercover: The Chase Begins. Where is THE LEGO game we all want?

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Sorry reader, the 3DS onslaught continues. Whist this gen struggles to find its feet and to distinguish itself enough from last generation, Nintendo's little handheld is just hitting it out of the park and Richie and I are both exclusively playing 3DS games (well excluding a dabble with Diablo 3 and Hearthstone).


I picked up LEGO City Undercover: The Chase Begins (LCU:TCB), the correct position of the colons in the title completely elude me. I'm a pretty big LEGO fan (I guess you could say I was an AFOL) and both Richie and I have picked up most of Traveller's Tales LEGO games over the years, enjoying the gentle but colourfully fun action and the official license tie-ins. By all accounts LCU:TCB is inferior to the Wii-U original but it's fun enough nonetheless. Think, a sand box city with a smidgen of a 'story mode' but by far the thrust and fun of the game comes from finding, collecting, riding, unlocking and buying a cornucopia of widgets, MacGuffins, costumes, gizmos and other unlocks. But this isn't a collectible hunt a la GTA's horseshoes, pigeons and seashells. It's way easier than that. The in-game scanner, Wii-U gamepad in the original, helps you to scan the nearby environment for collectibles and then all that remains is working out how to go and get it, some requiring action-specific costumes which are unlocked in story mode, others requiring tracing zip lines, climbing drain pipes and scaling rooftops to collect. As ever, the rub with this kind of gameplay is that by the time you've achieved slogging to get that ultimately empty 100% there's no reason or opportunity to use the last 20 costumes, vehicles and cheats you've unlocked because aside from cruising around everything has, in essence, been done. 

The draw distance and the loading times between sections of the city let the game down somewhat as does needing to go all the way back to the police station hub to buy and customise your character, meaning you end up running around collecting vehicles, costumes and red bricks, until you have collected enough studs to make a dent in buying everything for use in the game. On the other hand it is LEGO and a decent enough sandbox in your pocket to keep you going. I'll undoubtedly play it to 100% but then I have deep psychological problems when it comes to '100%ing' these types of games. But why do we keep getting these games which are essentially open environments with the odd pile of LEGO bricks here and there marking the interactable bits of the world?

Where's THE LEGO game?

At any given time, there are hundreds of LEGO games on the market. There's the TT series with licenses such as Batman, Marvel, Star Wars, Lord of the Rings which have the same gentle but not challenging gameplay geared around character specific actions to progress. Then there's the LEGO franchise games themselves such as the LEGO City games, the incestuous LEGO Movie game (game of the movie of the toy),  Legends of CHIMA MMO currently available and FunCom's LEGO Minifigures Online MMO currently in beta. On top of that there's the odd DS license spin-off game (Ninjago, LEGO Battles) and hundreds of web games on LEGO's official website. I don't think there's been a console since the PlayStation without a LEGO game, the LEGO Racers and LEGO Island franchises sticking out as fair-enough games before the TT stabdard came along. The company also tried its hand at a proper MMO with the short lived LEGO Universe, by all accounts an okay game hamstrung by a prohibitively expensive subscription model.


But the problem with all of these different games for me has been, where is the LEGO game to rule them all? The fun and potential of LEGO is a little bit playing with characters you know from licenses you enjoy but it's the building side of things which is what sets LEGO aside and sees it often topping polls for best toy of all time. Some of you may be thinking that Minecraft got in where LEGO really should have done (LEGO then bizarrely releasing a set of Minecraft sets seemingly acknowledging that Minecraft had, digitally at least, beat them at their own game) but there's still a model I think LEGO could made work.

One LEGO Game to Rule Them All

I'm imagining a LEGO game that combines all of what they've experimented with before. Imagine an online LEGO game combining the diversity of LEGO bricks with the business opportunities of Second Life and the imagination and creativity of Minecraft. Offline, there seems to be a problem or a business model with LEGO's production of physical sets. Sets are produced in seasons and routinely discontinued after a number of months on release in stores meaning every brick and minifigure is essentially limited edition. However, because LEGO don't officially run a print-on-demand series for their bricks, I wouldn't be surprised if the secondary market doesn't collectively make as much as LEGO does off of their products. Enterprising collectors bulk buy sets (perhaps a reason why LEGO have a limit on the number of sets any customer can purchase, a limit that merely inconveniences but hardly stops the hardcore buyer and seller) spotting bricks and minifigures which have had a limited availability and then through a myriad of websites break down the sets and sell them on for a profit. Okay so it's only the LEGO supernut that's going to shell out tens and hundreds of pounds on that limited release minifigure or limited colour of brick (I kid you not a lot of AFOL video reviewers will praise a new set for it's inclusion of a light tan wedge piece or two) but it's something that LEGO has never seemed to have tried to tackle. For a while they did offer a service called Design byME and/or LEGO Factory which let you virtually create sets online (from an extremely limited set of parts) and then order the physical product and even design the box. This service was discontinued due to quality of service issues.


I'm imagining a completely brick built world where every building and vehicle is built by the community in virtual real estate (similar to Second Life's model). Virtual parts are sold in store or you can claim codes found with real LEGO sets to unlock that set online ( a la the Pokemon trading card game which gives you virtual cards with every physical booster and deck set bought). LEGO could release it's entire back catalog of figures and instructions which can also be bought should you wish and parts and instructions for custom sets can be bought, sold and traded between players. Combine this with the ability to then order your own creations to be made into a physical product and, with the possibilities of what can be built with LEGO from brick portraits, 'pixel art' and your own custom minifigures it becomes part game, part creative community and part virtual sandbox (without taking up space). Throw in Little Big Planet's editor mode and all of a sudden you've got a LEGO game maker in there too. Years ago I would have seen that technically this would have been impossible coding and programming how the dizzying array of how LEGO bricks go together but PlayStation game LEGO Racers let you build your own cars, PC game LEGO Island was an entirely brick built world, there's not a device in the world that can't run Minecraft sandboxes and there's an entire indie industry in printing out physical versions of your Mii/avatar/custom LEGO figures. Chuck in some great image sharing, video editing and social tools too and this mythical LEGO game become the virtual equivalent of the already massive network of AFOL community sites.

Maybe LEGO already have something like this in the pipeline however judging from initial impressions of the LEGO Minifigures online game, the focus seems to be on free-to-play, two slowly accruing currencies that can be sped up with cash and collecting and playing with the characters from the lucrative LEGO Minifigures booster packs series. The characters can't be taken apart and mixed up. You can't build anything with LEGO bricks, instead wading through pre-built environments (cynically including a LEGO store complete with LEGO box kits as backdrop) to earn diamonds and studs to fill out the character roster. The emphasis on building and constructing has fallen by the wayside which is the main reason, in my opinion, why LEGO endures in popularity with children and adults alike. 

More Project X Zone Brilliance

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The above video shows all that is glorious about Project X Zone. Firstly you have Xenosagas KOS-MOS and T-ELOS (the scantily clad curvaceous androids) teaming up with Tekken's suicidal Pink-haired android Alisa which already is a crazy mind-blowing cross universe groin explosion.

Just skip to 40 seconds in.

Love and Jiggles,

Richie X

Tomodachi Life

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Earlier this year, life-sim lite, Tomodachi Life came out for the Nintendo 3DS. Unfortunately 90% of the coverage from the red top gaming sites exclusively focused on Nintendo's controversial decision to exclude same-sex relationships in the game. In itself that decision rightly deserves highlighting but as ever, the proper journalism parodying gaming press reported nothing but this, resulting in a lot of coverage that failed to explain what a 'Tomodachi Life' was in the first place. I don't know if Nintendo were happier to receive any coverage at all or unhappier that it was all negative. Interesting, especially given how the press fall over themselves to create content every time a GTA or Saint's Row comes out, with only a handful of the more thoughtful hacks sparing a sentence or two for the inherent misogyny, sexism and racism that those games portray (hastily followed by hand waivey 'but it's alright cos it's GTA isn't it?'). Anyway, turns out it's pretty good but I've got no idea how well it sold because that would be useful information. 

In short, Tomodachi Life is a life-sim lite a la Animal Crossing but with all the legwork taken out of it. If you're the kind of mouth breather who can't sleep at night if they think that they may have accidentally played a 'non-game' then do steer well clear of this. It's essentially a doll's house populated by your Miis be they friends, family, evil dictators or religious figures. For those of you whose real life is tragically pathetic then you can drop into Tomodachi Life, occassionally stuffing your resident's faces with food and helping them out with their trivial daily shit. What makes this 'game' is the suite of social tools so now you can get revenge on all those couples you know who think everything their spawn does is worthy of a Facebook header change and relentless spam them with the Japanese mentalness sprinkled daily comings and goings of your Miis. 

I'll shut up now. Here are some pictures and you can make your own mind up about it.  





























9/10 probably better than your real life but you're too chicken to kill yourself.
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